I know, without a doubt, that a range of emotions is completely normal. Before today, I’ve remained pretty positive with a little fear and anxiety mixed in. Today was the first time I experienced anger- not sure I’m really mad at my body for betraying me...more pissed off at the situation. Like I don’t have time for this shit. I wanted to wipe those emotions away and not feel them. But I didn’t. I let myself feel which is hard for me. Really hard. I know it’s ok to feel. Giving myself permission to feel made the feelings dissipate a little quicker.
Today is THE day. The day that I start the attack on this breast cancer. I’m sitting in a recliner right now receiving the pre-med infusion. Anti-nausea meds and saline fluids. The real stuff starts soon.
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2019
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